Anniversary

Anniversary. Such a hollow word when love is lost. A broken word that means too much. And all the same it means so little. Why love something that cannot be had? Why love a time that never was? It hurts to wish for something just out of reach. And yet i hold on to the glimmers of hope, all the while knowing my wish cannot come true. Tragic, really, a love that cannot be, a love that never really was, a love that felt more real than anything ever could. Two years ago my life changed some, i saw myself so clearly, i felt love and i loved in return. And as i sit here, staring at moments long ago lost, i wonder if we could ever have each other. Sometimes i am convinced the answer is yes, other times i am just as convinced that the answer is no. I suppose time will tell which is true. I suppose further anniversaries may come and go before i'll ever find an answer.

We broke.

There was a break in time and space, through which we slipped. In each other’s presence we disappeared. It was brief, but even brief bliss is bliss none the less. Unfortunately perfect worlds never exist for long, especially when reality sits in the shadows waiting to strike. And all the more unfortunate was how stifling reality became with each escape we made. Our moments will not soon disappear, not as long as memory remains: the many voyeurs who previewed our lives, the fleeting embraces we longed to hold onto, the smiles and tears and broken ‘I love you’s’, it all drifts in the constant ocean of my memory.